You COUNT Those Calories

Last night, I was having a conversation with a few friends about calorie counting. You see, I have a lot of mixed feelings about counting calories. I know the basic equation in which to lose weight you need to burn more calories in a day than you consume. That concept is clear to me. But is it really that easy?

Recently, I downloaded an app on my phone that helps you to keep track of your food consumption and exercise through the counting of calories. Now, this app, or "application" as one might say, is a great tool in the pursuit to obtain a healthier lifestyle. With this application, you select the foods that you have eaten throughout the day and plug them in to a sort of calculator. Each time you plug something in, the amount of calories you get to eat becomes fewer and fewer. It's neat because not only do they have basic food items like "apple" or "carrot" or "cinnamon bagel with extra extra pumpkin cream cheese" that you can choose from the list, but they also have popular store brands and restaurant items that you can choose if you are going out to eat. Same goes for exercise. You plug in which form of exercise you do, and it calculates the general calories burned for your age and weight.

Anyway, I'd been using this app for a about a month and everything had been working out great. That is until I started cheating. At first I was really on top of it. I found myself wanting to eat healthier, because generally healthier foods had fewer calories which meant I got to eat more. I would plug in things like, egg whites, turkey sandwich on whole wheat, 1 tsp mustard, 1 cup raw almonds, chicken breast, kale, kashi cereal with one cup almond milk, organic this, raw that, blah blah blah, etc etc etc, and be very proud of the outcome at the end of my calorie counting day. Proud, but so, so bored. How did people eat like this? You mean, if I wanted to drink a cup of OJ which, until calorie counting Ashley existed, I thought was maybe even healthy, I had to give up 260 of my precious calories in a day? No! Help! SOS!

So then, I started incorporating the exercise element into the app. I joined the gym. I ran, I biked, I zumba'ed, I yoga'ed, I hiked my little heart out as I watched the calories burn. With each exercise I would get this thrill knowing that I could eat whatever I wanted because I was burning the calories.


 I hit my ultimate low the day I looked up how many calories a person can burn per hour of walking. Yea, that was it, that was the low. Once I saw that the average person of my age and weight burned 140 calories an hour walking, calorie counting Ashley was ruined. You see, I have two jobs, both of which require me to walk and/or stand almost the whole time. One of which I do in HEELS while singing "Boop Boop Bee Doo" all day long. Both of which I am burning an average of  420-850 calories a day doing. 420-850 calories a day? While at work? I never need to exercise again!! You mean, if I am on a 1250 calorie diet, but I'm burning 600 calories a day at work I can eat 1850 calories a day if I just want to break even?!  Bring on the pizza! Bring on the sourdough bread bowl! Someone's saying yes to dessert tonight!

There were a few dark weeks after this "epiphany" where I'm not even going to tell you what calorie counting Ashley thought was okay to eat. I'll just say there were a lot of soft pretzels and pork belly involved. Eventually, I crawled out of that dark place and realized that maybe counting calories wasn't the best thing for me.

So, as we travel deeper and deeper into this Christmas cookie eating, latka making holiday season, I will leave you with this:

Portion control and an active lifestyle are incredibly important, not only for the way you look, but more importantly for your overall health. Eating an entire pizza and realizing that you've exceeded all of your calories for the day and then proceeding to go hungry for fear of going over is not okay. Eat that pizza, once in awhile. Maybe eat half of that pizza and then eat light, healthy snacks for the rest of the day. Don't torture yourself, especially during the holidays. If you want to eat that cookie, or cookie(s), eat them. More than anything, just be aware of balance. I'm no expert, but as someone who's gone through the extremes, that is my advice. As far as we know, we only live on this Earth once, so enjoy it, with moderation. Take care of yourselves but don't be afraid to indulge a little.

Happy Holidays everyone!

Namaste,

Ashley

Beignets: Just the French word for Donut.

The other night I was lucky to spend the evening with a close friend who I hadn't seen in awhile. One of the wonderful things about our friendship is even though we have not seen each other since the beginning of November, it's like we were just hanging out a week ago. Those are the kind of friends that one must hold on to. I think that if a person has even just one friendship like that in their lifetime, they can call themselves blessed.

Anyway, we decided to meet up at Downtown Disney for dinner before seeing a college friend of ours in a tour that was going through the area. When we met up, we quickly decided that the Mexican restaurant in Downtown Disney was where it was at . Chips and salsa, tamales, guacamole, margaritas; clearly a no- brainer. I ordered the nachos (with chicken instead of beef which was my one small victory for the evening) and he ordered a burrito that he put down in seconds flat. Now, New York City has TERRIBLE Mexican food. Anyone who has grown up or lived somewhere with great Mexican food will tell you that. So, naturally, my friend and I were taking advantage of the delicious Mexican food that we were so long parted with while living in NYC. Now I know you're probably thinking, "Ashley, you have lived back in Southern California for awhile now, how long can you really milk that excuse?" And it is true, but I was there supporting a friend as he found his way back to the Mexican goodness.

As we finished our meals and sat there staring at our empty plates, an idea popped into my head.

Let's get beignets!!!

My friend not only seemed to be waiting for me to announce my desire for this delicious treat, but he also said  "Are you going to blog about this? Beignets are  French Donuts."

And yes, yes I sure was going to blog about this perfect, delicious, hot fried dough creation. I feel like I would be doing myself, my readers, and the beignets themselves a disservice if I didn't blog about them.

Once we paid the bill, we wobbled the 50 feet from the Mexican Restaurant to the Jazz Kitchen Express to get our treat. At the "JKE," they have three sizes of beignets to choose from. You can get the small bag, which is four, the large bag, which is six, or the family size which was a dozen. As my eyes landed on the large bag, I asked my friend which size we should get. He promptly announced that of course we would get the small bag. Of course? Was it really an "of course" sort of decision, because I sure didn't think so.

Now, bag size wasn't the hardest decision of the evening. We went with the small bag and all was well. The toughest decision that I faced was if I should, in fact buy the take home box of beignet mix that made up to four dozen delicious beignets. What a brilliant thing to sell! What an amazing, mouth watering ten dollar purchase! I have spent ten dollars on a lot of silly things in my life, and this sure wouldn't be one of them! You mean, I could potentially have the option to eat beignets whenever I wanted to?? Someone is smiling down on me.

I must have picked up that box and put it back down on the shelf five times. Five. I want them, no you'll regret it. But I really want them, no you don't. I WANT them, no you can't eat beignets whenever you want anymore you aren't sixteen.

Why must we get older and have to start worrying about what we put into our bodies? Why can't we eat whatever tastes yummy with no repercussions? Where are the days when the word calorie or the phrase "weight gain" meant nothing?

To quote a favorite "Switchfoot" song, they are
                   "Gone, like yesterday is gone,
                             like history is
                    Gone, just trying to prove me wrong
                       and pretend like you're immortal."

Oh Switchfoot, what a band. Sure, they were probably singing about the Bible, and I am relating it to donuts, but it works! We are not immortal, but we can do our best to eat healthy and live an active lifestyle to promote a longer, healthier life.

So, needless to say, I put that box of beignet mix down, and walked away. It's the small victories, folks. Sure, I stuffed my face with delicious doughy goodness that night, but I did not bring a box home to ease my constant urge for this French treat. Which leads me to this: a treat is defined as an event or item that is out of the ordinary and gives great pleasure. If I had brought a box home, it would have given me great pleasure, but it would no longer be out of the ordinary.

I am going to attempt to live by that definition when it comes to treats. Attempt to make them a little bit more out of the ordinary so that they give me even greater pleasure when I do eat them.

Anyway, that's all I've got for now!

Namaste,

Ashley

Confession: I Shop Hungry

I have a bit of a problem. 

Parking in my neighborhood is a nightmare. Now I know I'm far from alone in this problem. I have heard so many people comment on parking in LA in the past, but wasn't able to relate, as I was living in New York without a car. Well, now I can relate. 

On Thursdays and Fridays my street has street sweeping/cleaning/moving trash and dirt from one location on the street to another location on the street from 8-10 AM. These mornings are my worst enemy. 

If I am lucky enough to get a spot on the "Thursday side" on Wednesday nights, or the "Friday side" on Thursday nights, a feeling of pure euphoria fills me up in a way that is almost frightening for a person simply obtaining a parking spot. 

If I do not get a said "Thursday side" or "Friday side" spot the night before, I am forced out of my house at 7:30 AM (early for me, I work nights people!) into the zombie apocalyptic like land of sleepy faced flesh hungry, or in our case, parking spot hungry residents. We all eye each other up and down as we run-walk to our cars as "casually" as possible in hopes to be the first to start our engines in the hunt for a scared parking spot. It's wild out there folks. If I were called into a Walking Dead audition, I think I would have no trouble finding a way to relate to the character I was called in for, as all I would have to do is think on my Thursday and Friday morning battles. Battles that I have to say, I am pretty stellar at. I'd like to think of myself as that fierce black woman on Walking Dead, Michonne who walks around with the two zombies on a leash. She may be small, but people take one look at her and know that she is not to be messed with. 

Anyway, what brings me to this zombie parking space rant is, believe it or not, grocery shopping. What an odd transition of thoughts, right? So, because my neighborhood is so "survivor like" when it comes to parking, I have to be very timely about when I go places in my car. I know that if I leave at certain times of the day, there is no way I am going to find a spot when I get back. The worst is when I go grocery shopping and know that I am going to be carrying way too much stuff back from my car. I do need to give a quick shout out to my boyfriend though who, whenever he is home happily meets me at my car no matter how far it may be parked to help me bring my groceries upstairs. Thank you!! 

I have figured out in the past 5 or so months of living in LA that the best time to go grocery shopping and successfully obtain a prime real estate parking spot is in the morning. On mornings that I go grocery shopping and manage to eat breakfast before, I have great success. On the mornings that I go grocery shopping and don't eat breakfast, I have epic, epic fails. The problem is, I usually wait too long to go grocery shopping and don't have anything to eat for breakfast, and therefore go to the grocery store hungry. My shopping list may start as simple as, for example: Milk, yogurt, bread, turkey, granola, bananas, apples, peanut butter. And end up in my cart like this: Milk, yogurt, bread, muffins, turkey, salami, granola, frosted flakes, bananas, pop tarts, peanut butter, three different types of jelly, cookies, cheese, "less guilt" brownie mix, cheese,  crackers, cheese, white wine, more cheese, pita chips, more cheese, and the list goes on and on. 

Why is it that I know going to the grocery store hungry will end up in my purchasing the entirety of Traders Joe's, yet I still do it? I'll tell you why. Because it's a good excuse. "Oh shoot. I bought the whole store. Oh well, I was hungry. I guess I'll have to eat all of this now, I wouldn't want to be a waster." 

Not only does this whole shopping hungry do a number on my waistline, but it does a number on my bank account as well. The other day, I challenged myself to go to the grocery store after eating. I spent $35!! This is huge as my total is usually at least $60 when I buy groceries. Not only did I only spent $35, but I didn't buy a bunch junk either. Granted, I still bought the "less guilt" brownies, but I DO feel LESS guilty! 

So hopefully, lesson learned in my part. Lose a few inches, and gain a few dollars. What an awesome idea! For anyone who is out there like me, and finds that they over purchase when they're hungry, eat something, eat ANYTHING before you go shopping. You'll feel better in more ways than one. 

That's all I've got for today. Until next time!

Namaste!

Ashley 

Thank You for the Compliment

Thank You for the Compliment 

As some of you may or may not know, I have been working in restaurants for a pretty long time now. My first serving job was at the Islands in Fullerton my senior year of college. I quit working at Disney the summer before in part because my Mom had told me that since I wanted to be an actress I would need to get some serving experience since that was what actresses did. I wonder if my Mom knew how right she would be when she told me that.

Fast Forward to almost five years and two coasts later. I am still asking people if they want sweet potato fries or a side salad with their burger, or what type of vodka they would like in their vodka soda. Stolli, Kettle One, or our new, exciting gluten free option, Titos?

I don't mind waiting tables. There are few jobs out there that allow a person the flexibility that waiting tables allows for the amount of money a person can make. Though I do have to say, I look forward to the day when the only reason I go to a restaurant is to eat tapas and drink delicious signature cocktails with all sorts of tasty fruits and spices muddled in the bottom.

What brings me to this post today is a comment that I received last night that I have gotten on multiple occasions. I worked a birthday party yesterday for a very sweet woman and her 30+ guests. She and her husband were everything a waiter could hope for. Kind, considerate, low maintenance, and insistent that we include a 20% gratuity on the total bill. At the end of the night, as the host was leaving, she pulled me into a tight hug and said, "Thank you so much, dear. You are SUCH a wonderful waitress." Now of course, I hugged her back and graciously thanked her for her sweet comment, and thanked her for spending her birthday with us at the restaurant.

As she walked away, I couldn't help but get the feeling that I've gotten in the past when people have given me the same "compliment." A wonderful waitress. Thank you so much. I love waiting tables. And I love even more that you think I'm wonderful at waiting tables. I love serving. I love clearing away your empty glasses and half full plates of food as my mouth waters and I fight the temptation to eat one of the fried cheese fritters you've left untouched.

These thoughts are one of the major reason why I've decided to get my butt back into yoga. I am not okay with being a person that takes a positive, warm compliment, and then turns it into something negative. This is exactly what I did last night, and have done so often in the past. Fortunately, when I had my "moment" last night,  I did something that I have never done before. I allowed myself to breath and reminded myself that this is a part of my life, and that I strive to be the best version of myself in whatever I do. Weather it be singing, acting, writing, or being the best girlfriend, daughter, sister, friend, or even waitress, I want to be my best self for everyone.

While in child's pose this morning, my yoga instructor told us to let something go with our exhale. I've heard this in past classes, but haven't been able to do so. Today I let something go. I let go the negativity I'd been feeling. I'm not saying it won't come back and that I will be all positive, all the time, but this morning I was able to let it go. What a freaking awesome feeling.

And to that lady last night who was so sweet and genuine, I'd like to send out my own genuine, honest thank you. No, I do not dream of waiting tables, but I appreciate that you appreciated me. All I can ask of myself is to be the best version of myself in all that I do, and I look forward to sending that energy forward more in the future, instead of wasting my energy on negativity.

That's all I've got for now :)

Namaste!

Ashley

And for you, Miss?

And for you, Miss?

Last night, I went out to dinner with a group of friends after a show. We went to a German restaurant called Wirtshaus that I’d never been to before. In fact, until last night, I’d never stepped foot into a German restaurant. I am not a big fan of beer, and I don’t quite know what schnitzel or sauerbraten are, so I have managed, up to this point, to steer clear.

But, because my friends were going, and I’ve been known to enjoy a glass of German riesling and a chili dog from Weinersnitchel from time to time, I decided to be adventurous and go.

Once we were seated and handed the menus, I began searching for something familiar. My eyes immediately landed on the soft pretzel, which looked to be the safety item, and also one of my “go tos,” but was quickly told by our waiter that they were fresh out. I attempted then, to decipher what all the German menu items meant, and what I thought I could eat without over thinking what were actually in said German menu items.

After quickly shutting down the blood sausage and duck pate options, I finally settled on one of two choices.

The brussel spouts, or the cheesecake.

As the server, (who for his sake was thankfully not in the traditional lederhosen) went around the table asking everyone for their order, I began creating a pros and cons list in my head of the two items.

Brussel Sprout : PROS: *healthy for you *you don’t eat enough greens *have garlic in them which you love *you really like brussel sprouts *only $4 CONS: not cheesecake

Cheesecake: PROS: *delicious *covered in raspberry sauce which is a fruit which is healthy *also only $4  CONS: *YOU HAD DONUTS FOR BREAKFAST

Needless to say, one con was enough on the cheesecake list to realize I needed to go with the brussel sprouts.

Could I look myself in the mirror after I ate donuts for breakfast this morning? Yes.

Could I have looked myself in the mirror when I got home last night after having donuts for breakfast and then cheesecake for dinner? No.

After our food was delivered to us, and I was served a child-sized portion of brussel sprouts, the topic of conversation landed on Taco Bell and their new Cool Ranch Doritos taco. A friend of mine said he had managed to stay away when they had their Nacho Cheese Doritos taco, but once they came out with the Cool Ranch, he was unable to resist.

As I unenthusiastically poked at my mediocre German brussel spouts , my mind wandered to my college days when I would carelessly pull up to the Taco Bell/ Pizza Hut Express in Fullerton and order a bean and cheese burrito, two soft tacos, three bread sticks and cheese dip to dip all of the above in, without a second thought. And I’m talking on the regular here, like at least once a week. Now, at twenty-seven, I feel guilt ridden when tempted to eat even half of what I ordered in college.

Who knew those five years who make such a difference in a person’s mindset? Do I always make the best decisions when it comes to food; absolutely not. But at least I think about the consequences now.

Though I really wanted to indulge in “Fourth Meal” at Taco Bell last night, I told myself no, and drove straight home. Instead, I got up early this morning, ate a bowl of Wheat Chex, and went to an advanced yoga class at the studio by my house.

Could I do all the moves? No, I could not. But I pushed myself, stretched further than I have been able to in awhile, and felt just incredible once the class was over. It was painful, tiring, and sweaty, but truly exciting at the same time. 

Though during the class I wasn’t having as much fun as eating raspberry cheesecake or Taco Bell, I can honestly say that the feeling post class was far and away better than the feeling after any cheesecake or Taco Bell indulgence I’ve had.

That’s all I’ve got for today.

Namaste!

Ashley 

Yoga and Donuts

Two things that do not seem to go together. Two things that make me, and I am sure other women and men out there, feel so good for all the right, and maybe all the wrong in the latter cases, reasons.

I find, that in my life, I am constantly battling myself between good and bad decisions when it comes to fitness and healthy eating. I have all the best intentions, sometimes. I make smart decisions, sometimes. I may indulge in dessert a little more than sometimes. I think about wanting to work out more than I actually work out. I excitedly thumb through various fitness apps for my ipad or phone that count calories, map out and calculate my distance ran, or suggest healthy alternative eating plans.

 When it come down to it, my real, most deep rooted "healthy living obstacle," is that I LOVE sweets. I don't want to give up sweets and I don't know if I ever could. I've gone through periods in my life where I've given up fried foods or other various salty enemies, but to be completely honest, other than a donut craving from time to time, it wasn't all that hard for me. It wasn't a real challenge like completely giving up sweets would be. The thought alone is completely daunting.

Give up sweets? You're joking. You mean, like no cookies, not even if they're from Trader Joes? Because if they're from Trader Joes, that means they're healthier than other cookies, right? If I buy organic pop tarts then I can eat both in the little silver package without feeling any guilt, right? No, no, no, see, this ice cream is from Whole Foods. It's made with organic reduced fat milk. Totally different. Now where'd my spoon go?

These are the thoughts that spin through my sugar addicted brain on a regular basis.

So, here's the deal. I've decided to start this blog as I continue my journey through all of the right and wrong decisions I make in my quest for healthier living. I will not lie to you, the reader, and will openly and honestly admit when I've had donuts for breakfast (i.e. this morning) and when I've gotten myself to a yoga class (also i.e. this morning). I am not perfect, and am not striving for perfection. I know everyone has different ideas on healthy living, and I am simply seeking out a better balance in my life. I look forward to sharing with all of you.

Namaste!

Ashley